And it continues again and again Sorry for the title, the boys, but the other day I dreamed I was pregnant with a third daughter (yes, really) and they called her Rosie. The good news is that it was a dream, and the bad news is that it's been two weeks since I have some songs by Francis Cabrel in the head. So here I confess candidly, I'm at the point where I have to share my nightmare with my neighbor. With you. Gnac, gnac.
But I know you, oh readers whose curiosity is matched by the fierce desire of Pim's Orange Cake with two in the mornin '(in any case, if you look a little bit to unworthy father, you're like that). You wonder "but what may well go on and on, name of a little boy?" My stories
toilets. That's going on, again and again.
As you know, several months ago that I try to recapture the territory of the telescope. I have the weakness to believe that it is my right to want to pee / poo / take my shower in peace. Forlorn hope, I admit, but how to live on, if not? However, I often feel that my prayers and injunctions are lost in the vortex of a vicious flush metaphorical.
Mother unworthy - OK, everyone, be strong. I go to the toilet.
I'll lock the door . Please do not disturb me unless absolutely necessary.
Everyone - Compriiiis!
Mother unworthy - (In business
.)
Elder Daughter - (
Toc.) Mommy?
Mother unworthy - (Se
shows far, far away, at the end of the world, amid a wilderness welcoming, with a banana in your ear for good measure.)
Elder Daughter - (
Toctoctoc .) Mommy. Mom? Maaaamaaannn! MAM!
Mother unworthy - What? But what, then??
Elder Daughter - Uh ...
Mother unworthy - is urgent
?
Elder Daughter - Somewhat, yes.
I finish the work in triple speed (which in itself constitutes inhuman treatment complained of by the Geneva Conventions against torture) then I unlocked the door.
Elder Daughter - Because there was disguised as a baby bunny, and there, I explained that I was
also a rabbit because my Chinese sign is the Rabbit, and that she
, it was a -
Baby - ZE COOOOOOOQ'M NOT!
Elder Daughter - Yes, you're a cock -
Baby - NAAAAOOOOOON!
Elder Daughter - ... because your Chinese sign is the Rooster
...
Baby
fitting a rabbit mask on her face transformed into a vale of tears - MAMAAAAAAAANZESUISUNLAPINPASMA
SOEURETZESUISPASUNCOOOOOOQ!
Mother unworthy
helpless, not knowing how to explain that - Because there is this I can go to toilet? Because I thought I was done but I have not finished -
Baby - Mom? Ze want to do crafts with you worse it will get better.
Mother unworthy - Ack. Maybe Dad could ... Chériiii?
Elder Daughter - Dad has just entered the bathroom. He told me to tell you that it would be entrenched for the next two hours.
Mother unworthy - Shit.
short, in my struggle for the domestication of a toilet, I keep losing battles. But I do not despair of winning the war!
Finally, I do not
despair. Because the other day, I confess, I was shaken.
I had a good feeling though. Especially since, that day, I stayed home to work. You see me coming.
Home Alone. The opportunity to attend the toilet without feeling like we were there to scroll the Olympic flame.
At first it was really good. I did everything I had to do, quiet - the locked door, anyway, you never know, a passer would have to go To advise the head in the doorway in urgent need of knowing the square root 23.
is in the shower once the problems started.
Mother unworthy - AOOO Élyséééées fields, toulitoudoudouuu, aôôôôôôô Élyséééées fields, pfoufoudifouf-
First Dog - (
Gratte .) Woof!
Mother unworthy - C'mon then.
First Dog - (
Grattegrattegrattegratte .) Woof! Woof? Aouuuuuu! Mother-AOUUU
unworthy - Dog First! Stop it now!
First Dog was arrested for best start to a flying claws, towards the patio door. "Woof! Ouaouaouaf!
Ouaffeuh , good blood brothel chnoutte! You must come, venerated mistress! I swear, it is MEGA IMPORTANT! AOUUUUUUU! "
Good. Here, I remind you that I was alone at home. And Dog First, this brave dog does not bark
for nothing. He hardly lets out a few (tens ) bark (sound) when he sees a squirrel, the neighbor's dog hears, sees the postman to arrive or what he believes to be his shadow, imagines that the garbage truck passes or simply when bored a bit. In short, I was still a little worried.
And if something serious was happening in the backyard? And if the neighbors had finally had enough of our hedge badly cut, they had decided to take matters in hand with great bursts of chainsaw? Or worse: what if the executive committee of Ville de Laval had unanimously declared that Mother became illegal unworthy of adoption on its soil? I would defend myself pathetically: "Corrupting motherhood, me? But Your Honour, all I ever wanted was to make jokes! Besides, let me tell you the times Baby -" But you interrupt me, you throw me in jail. Unworthy father would run to the Jean-Coutu get closer to that of the hemlock, Socrates as feminine, I can choose to shorten myself my suffering. But no, I'm mad, there's more of hemlock in our pharmacies deliquescent! Instead, Father unworthy return with twenty boxes of Tylenol for children. In addition, I know him, he would have chosen the flavor gum Baloune, most disgraceful, and loves me because I would not want to swallow ... Or he would have done it in revenge for the fact that I dropped his saxophone on the floor the other day? But it was an accident! It was ... Yes, good with all this I had to go see what was going on. I'm out of the shower, dripping, half-naked (but not! I leave the shower! I'm naked, anyway! Forgive me, theatrical, I know, but it was too long as I did not write a ticket).
Dog First, in full imitation of dervish - Woof, woof! Czech it, venerated mistress! Did you see THAT?? J'capoooooote! Aouuuuuuuuuuuuuu! AOUUUUUU!
Snow. It was snow. First dog was freaked out and pulled me to the bathroom because it was snowing. After
garrocha have the dog outside to allow it to appreciate all the pastoral side, playful and wonderfully icy flakes that build bridges between us and the sky (still Cabrel gnac gnac), I'm back in the shower.
The moral of the story? When events overwhelm us, we must remember that there is a way out cleaner.
